I was thinking today that my life is crazy, but it could be crazier. There are people out there that go through so much on a daily basis and have so much less than I do. I am not rich, actually kind of poor. But there is always a roof over our heads, food on the table, clothes on our backs, etc. Some people don't have that and for some it's not there faults, they didn't make horrible decisions in there life but just had bad things happen to them. I am grateful for all that I have. I have 3 wonderful children who may have there challenges but have made me a stronger person and who will come out stronger by having to cope with their disability.
I worry about Alex's future. With having autism he has a lot of problems with socialization. Right now just being in early childhood, all the kids absolutely love him but when they get a bit older the other children will start noticing that Alex is different and may start to tease him. When I bring him to school all the kids are like, " Alex is here. Hi Alex. " Even though he doesn't acknowledge them, they are still happy to see him but I don't know how long that will last. I don't think that Alex understands that he is different yet and I don't know how I will explain autism to him that he can understand. I also don't want him to think that he can use his disability as an excuse for bad behaviors or as an excuse for not trying.
Same thing goes for Katie. I don't want her to use her disability as an excuse for bad behaviors or as an excuse for not trying. I worry about having to tell her that her mother's alcohol use during pregnancy is the cause for her issues. I don't want her to end up being an angry person because of what her mother did to her. It will be a long road with her because I have to reteach everything to her at least a couple of times before it sticks in her mind. Her memory is that bad. One day she knows how to do something and the next it's like she has never done it before. I worry about other kids teasing her for being a slower learner and her just giving up because of the teasing. She is so lovable and funny. I don't want her to ever stop being who she is. I can only hope that with therapy and school that she will start making some progress with her issues.
I worry that Aiden will eventually be diagnosed as being on the fetal alcohol disorder spectrum. I can only hope that he will be one of the lucky one's and not be affected at all. He doesn't have any of the facial characteristics but as I found out with Katie that doesn't mean that he isn't affected. Katie doesn't have any of the facial characteristics of FAS but has all the behavioral issues that goes along with the disorder. I know I am just a big worry wort but with having children with disabilities, you worry about what issues will develop in the future. But I have also learned how to celebrate every little accomplishment that "normal" parents take for granted (no offense intended). It feels good to write down all my fears for my children's futures so if they don't happen I can check them off as worrying for nothing. And I would rather be prepared for at least some of the issues that might come up than be blind sided and not know what to say or do.
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